In a modern school setting, it’s common to find a classroom with one or more students who are autistic or have Asperger’s, ADHD, or another learning or physical disability. Teaching other children about their peers with special needs, in a friendly and respectful way, goes a long way.
In current settings, it is becoming increasingly important to Teach your child about a friend with disability
If children don’t seem to understand that a classmate has certain special needs, it helps to explain some facts and clear up any myths. Schools across the United States, the United Kingdom and Australia are investing in disability awareness in the classroom, so that students with disability are treated with respect by their peers.
Disabilities: A recap
Children can be born with a disability or become disabled through an accident or illness. Disability covers a wide range. Visible disabilities, such as when someone uses a wheelchair or a cane, are easy to notice and talk about. Other disabilities are more hidden, such as learning disabilities, ADHD and autism spectrum disorders, and these can be harder for other children to understand.
Talking about disability
The best approach is to talk about it openly rather than avoid it! Children, being less inhibited, are often better than their parents at approaching disability.
Adults often worry about seeming intrusive or insensitive, but children usually don’t have these worries. A smile or a friendly “Hello!” comes easily to them, and most parents of disabled children would gladly welcome it.
As a parent of a non-disabled child, there are quite a few things you can do to help your child connect with a disabled classmate. Many children’s activities don’t need much talking. Board games, arts and crafts, and even some sports are good examples.
Parents on both sides can encourage play dates with a child who has a disability. Or invite the child to your child’s birthday party. Call the parents beforehand and ask what would help their child enjoy it, and share any questions you have so the play date or outing goes well. Learn the basics of how the child communicates (for example, signs, pictures or a communication device) so you and your child can understand them better. This may also answer any questions you or your child have.
How schools provide for special needs?
Most children with disability attend mainstream public schools, and many need extra support or adjustments. Some families find that specialised schools suit children with Autism, while many autistic children do well in mainstream schools with the right support. Cost also puts private specialised schools out of reach for many families.
A classmate with special needs may stand out more than other children. Many public schools have support teachers or aides who work one-on-one with students who need it, sometimes for long periods. A teacher may also wear a microphone if a student is deaf or hard of hearing, so the student can hear them better.
What Other parents MUST Understand
Having a classmate with a disability is more common than you might think, so it’s important for your child to learn about disability and be friendly to disabled children. There’s a fair chance there is one in your child’s class, so guide your child to be open to friendship and to start conversations where they can.
You can start with these basic ideas and add your own as you go.
- No two people in the world are the same.
- Differences always exist. Some are just more noticeable.
- Disability is only one part of a person. They also have likes and dislikes, strengths and challenges, just like everyone else. Having a disability doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have friends, be respected or be included.
- Disability is NOT contagious.
- A physical disability isn’t the same as a cognitive disability.
- Every person with a disability is different. Some disabled children take longer to do certain tasks, sometimes with help or adaptive equipment, and they may be just as strong (or stronger) in other areas.
- Use clear and respectful language when talking about disability. Younger children remember simple explanations easily. For example, a wheelchair is like a pair of legs on wheels.
- Name calling is never okay, even as a joke. Anything that hurts people’s feelings is unacceptable. The same applies to any form of bullying (Read: Autism and Bullying).
- Many TV shows and videos positively portray disabled children. Sesame Street, for example, regularly includes children with disability in its episodes. Watch together and talk about it!
- Many schools run disability-awareness programs. Find out if your child’s school offers one. From engaging activities to guest speakers, they can be a lot of fun.
A case study of Jane
Jane (not her real name) is 8 years old and a really sweet kid who loves being around people. She has cerebral palsy, is non-verbal (non-speaking) and uses a wheelchair. She goes to her local public school and spends time both in and out of her third grade classroom (with a one-to-one aide). She also visits her friends’ houses, goes horse riding and plays board games.
She communicates using augmentative communication boards, and she gets around in a wheelchair. As Jane’s mother says:
She finds other kids great. They are very direct, which is good. They like her too and interactions are spontaneous.
I am Ash and I celebrate Neurodiversity! Growing up with an elder brother with severe Autism was tough – but it has also taught me essential life lessons. I don’t believe that people with Autism are necessarily or have any disorder (except in extreme cases). They are just different! And that is something to be proud of! I am passionate about helping other families who may have Autism conditions in their family. So please reach out and drop me a note. I will be glad to help 🙂
