How to Explain Autism to Kids?

Wondering how to explain autism to kids? Or what to say to neurotypical kids about siblings on the autism spectrum?

Some people may discourage discussions about autism simply because they feel awkward about the topic or they’re concerned about how the individual will receive the news. This can convey the wrong message that disability and autism are not topics we’re supposed to explore, even if we’re well meaning or have the individuals’ best interests at heart. Explaining autism in simple terms helps normalize it. 

It can be tough to explain autism to your child, your child’s siblings, or friends, so we provide practical tips below to help you discuss autism with children and guide them in becoming caring friends with your child.

How to Explain Autism to a Child Who’s Been Diagnosed?

Autism can be a complex thing for us to comprehend or even explain to children in simple language. Children with autism are not defective, broken, or a burden, they simply view and interact with the world in their own unique way and need support from other people who want to take the time to understand them. 

With proper communication and lots of patience, we can live a better life. That’s why it’s critical to show your kids in an age-appropriate manner that, with or without autism, extraordinary things can happen. 

Talking about autism with children can sometimes be quite tricky, but you’ll find some helpful tips below on how to explain and discuss autism with your little one. 

1. Come to Terms with the Diagnosis first

Getting an autism diagnosis can come as a shock and be overwhelming, which explains why the first step to take ought to be to give yourself time to process the news before explaining it to your child.

Processing the autism diagnosis takes time and might involve accessing educational materials to understand this lifelong condition, accepting your situation, and sharing your thoughts, feelings and concerns with a trusted relative, friend, or professional counselor for advice on what to do next. 

When to share this information is a personal decision that will vary from family to family and person to person, depending on the situation or circumstances. 

2. Talk Positively about Differences

Discuss with your kids what they excel in and what they find challenging and explain that this is different for different people. Explain that the world would be very dull if we didn’t have any differences. 

Once you talk about differences in a positive light and explain to your child that it’s normal to be physically or neurologically, it will be much easier to tell your child that they are autistic.

Normalizing differences is critical, and so is associating our differences to abundance. We need mathematicians, musicians, artists, engineers, teachers, and others to make the world the amazing place we live in. 

Differences are not only normal, they are essential. 

3. Explain that we all Learn Differently

It’s also critical to explain to kids how we learn. Encourage them to visualize how they would prefer to learn or how they actually learn, whether that’s by doing, playing, reading, watching tutorials, and so on. Help children understand that all these are good ways to learn and that different people learn differently. .

4. Discuss Strengths

Autism often causes differences in social communication skills in autistic kids, but that isn’t necessarily a negative. 

Using positive language, you can help your autistic child understand how this neurological condition makes them behave differently from others.  These differences can be viewed as strengths over time. Every child, regardless of their communication and support needs, has strengths and talents to offer. 

Help children identify and appreciate their own unique talents or abilities. Where does s/he do exceptionally well? Identifying, acknowledging and appreciating what one has can reduce stress and increase contentment or happiness. 

4. Discuss Challenges

Everyone you encounter is trying to overcome their own challenges and needs assistance in particular aspects of their life. 

The best way to start a conversation about challenges with children on the autism spectrum is to explore your own difficulties and mistakes, to explain your own challenges over time, to seek help when overwhelmed, and to say sorry if need be. 

5. Talk about Fairness and being Kind

Explain to your children about how being fair and kind doesn’t necessarily mean treating everyone the same way of doing the same thing for everyone. Help them understand that some individuals need help in different areas to reach the same level as other people. Just as the child may need someone to pick them up to get something from a high shelf. 

Talk about kindness and understanding, and remind your child that everybody is talented in certain areas and not so talented in others so it’s not right to bully or make fun at anyone who isn’t very talented in any area. 

6. Start Talking about Autism

Use this simple autism explanation to explain what the condition involves. 

Autism is an umbrella term that describes the neurological differences that manifest in someone or a group of people. 

While we are all different in one way or another, some individuals are neurologically different from others and are said to be autistic.  

Starting the autism conversation early in a child’s life is critical to helping them understand the difficulties they may face and also helps foster empathy for other autistic children. 

7. Make the Discussion Polite

The initial discussion about autism should be light-hearted. Autism can be a difficult topic to explore, particularly in the context of young children with the condition, but discussing the good things and keeping the discussion light and friendly can assist in increasing a child’s self-confidence. 

While autism has its negatives, try to stick to the positives and avoid any negative connotations as much as you can. Children with autism can eventually learn, understand, and accept, leading to self discovery and self-acceptance. 

8. Provide Reinforcement and Support

Explaining autism to an autistic child can be tricky, but adults can be supportive and encouraging during the conversation. Parents, siblings, and others should let those with autism and other conditions know there are numerous resources and support services available to help them learn and understand their diagnoses. 

ABA therapy helps individuals overcome some of their challenges, while visual supports address restrictive or repetitive behaviors and assist with recognizing any social cues they might be missing. That way, kids can learn and understand they are not alone in their developmental journeys. 

9. Allow Time for Questions

Explaining autism to someone cannot be achieved in one or two meetings. The person requires time to process the newfound information about themselves at a pace they are comfortable with. 

Allowing your child to ask questions can help them better understand autism and teach them it is not a bad topic to be kept under wraps.

Even if you don’t know everything about autism (no one does) and you don’t have the answers to all questions, saying you’re unsure and researching together is a fantastic way to demonstrate that it’s okay not to know everything and discuss how to find answers to the questions. That way, you and your children can feel more comfortable discussing autism and its challenges at any time.  

When Should Parents Tell Their Children They Have Autism?

Respect and kindness are key when explaining autism to children and other people. Discussing autism with a child who has just been diagnosed is tricky, but parents face a greater challenge if the child realizes they are autistic on their own. 

No matter when your little one was diagnosed, now is the best time to start explaining autism to them. Many parents feel they should avoid discussing autism with their kids simply because they don’t want their children to feel bad or ‘weird’ .

Depending on what level your autistic child is on the spectrum, chances are they will understand and accept their diagnosis and circumstances. However, if they learn from someone else, they might not be as understanding when their parents try to support them in the future. 

These are clear concerns, but also helping kids learn about autism shouldn’t hinder them from accomplishing their goals.  

How to Explain Autism to a Child without Autism?

When talking to non-autistic children about their siblings with autism, you need to be understanding, empathetic and patient. An autism diagnosis is a major change in an individual’s life and s/he needs you to be supportive and answer all the questions they might have. 

Explain autism in simple language and highlight that it’s a spectrum condition impacting how an individual behaves, expresses themselves, and experiences their surroundings. Let them know that autism causes the brain to work differently and makes each person with autism  unique. 

You may also want to talk to children about autism in terms of sensitivities, “bright lights are overwhelming for some autistic children; some kids with autism have trouble with bright lights, let others know it, etc.” Reading magazines and books or watching shows about the autism spectrum together is also beneficial in increasing understanding as is sharing stories of famous people with autism to help normalize autism and reduce any feelings of anxiety and isolation.

How to Explain Autism to Adults?

To make other adults resonate with your autism explanation, find good examples you can use such as particular behaviors, preferences, likes or dislikes. 

Be sure to address and try to bust common myths and misconceptions surrounding autism and reassure them that although autism poses challenges in one’s daily life, many people with autism lead happy, fulfilling lives with proper support. 

Allow time for them to ask questions and share their thoughts.  Provide them with helpful resources for research and further guidance such as books, magazines, and online forums. 

In addition to raising awareness, emphasize the importance of increasing understanding and being patient with both the autistic person and themselves. These are complex challenges that would test even the best of everyone. 

Conclusion

So that’s it! In this post, we’ve shared helpful tips and ideas on how to explain autism to kids, friends and family and we’ve explained the importance of encouraging clear communication, nurturing empathy, and creating a robust support network. Increasing understanding, promoting empathy, and exercising patience after the autism diagnosis are key to creating a more inclusive and supportive environment for autistic individuals and their loved ones as they navigate their unique journeys.